Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: AVENGERS: ENDGAME (infinity% NO SPOILERS)

It’s here! FINALLY! No, I’m not talking about AVENGERS: ENDGAME but rather my review for it. You’ve been wanting to read this, I can just feel it (eyeroll)…even though I really can’t tell you shit about it. I promised infinity% no spoilers and that’s exactly what you are going to get. So how am I going to get around this intro? Hmmm…well, I can say it’s the best film of 2019 so far, and while I doubt it will reign at the top the whole year it is likely to stay in my top ten by Jan 2020. I can also tell you that it is a very satisfying finale. Never has anything every been done before that has been this grand. And even with Marvel already planning another decade of films, I doubt this is going to happen again. Eleven years of storytelling all culminating into one big three hour blockbuster (5 and a half if you count Infinity War). And the fact that it stuck the landing is just all the more commendable.

The movie is epic. All the action scenes are great. The special effects are top notch and on point. The writing is very, very clever. All the emotional scenes are…well emotional, and if you don’t have at least a lump in your throat several times throughout and at the end, then maybe these films really weren’t for you in the first place. This film makes Justice League look like The Room. Not the Brie Larson one. The Tommy Wiseau one. How this film didn’t feel like three hours is absolutely astonishing. The character arcs are mostly 100% fulfilling. The whole thing makes you wonder how this thing is going to continue (although it gives you subtle hints). The film takes its time and doesn’t feel rushed. The pacing is near perfect. How a superhero story can be on such a giant scale such as this and everything be near perfect on a narrative and emotional scale is unbelievable.

That’s not to say the film doesn’t have its problems. If you want to talk about it in person or in a private message I do have a couple of issues I could go into with explicit detail. I won’t reveal anything specific on here. But they are minor, and a couple might be explained better in future movies, especially Spider-Man: Far From Home in July. I can tell you without revealing anything at all is that I had a problem with some of the humor. Not Last Jedi level cringe worthy, but there were a couple of spots where I felt the movie held on for a punchline or a shot too long just to make sure the audience laughs because the screenplay told them to. One problem I had with the film I definitely could not be vocal about on social media or I’d get my fucking ass handed to me. If you’ve seen the movie, you know the scene I’m talking about.

And all the acting from everyone from their respective characters is incredible. Everyone did a good job. And if I could either start a petition now for Robert Downey Jr. to get a best supporting actor nod for his performance as Tony Stark here and it would make a difference, I would do it in a heartbeat. Him, Karen Gillan, and Chris Evans completely steal the show here. And of course Josh Brolin is great as Thanos once again, and solidifies his place as one of the best villains in MCU history, although his story was more in Infinity War than it was here. This is OUR heroes story. We cheer for them, we’ve followed them for more than a decade, so we need it to focus on them. And boy does it deliver in spades. The direction is good, the editing is great, the movie making on a technical sense I had absolutely no problems with. The Russo Brothers did a fantastic job, and I know they said they are taking a break from the MCU but I’d welcome them back anytime if they decided to change their minds.

Anyway, that’s it. That’s my review. That’s all I can say. I can’t say whether they wrap up storylines and/or character exits and I can’t say what I thought of them if they happen to have happened. That’s for you to go out and see for yourself, because you already know whether or not you are going to eventually see this film. If you’ve never seen a Marvel movie and all this hype peaks your interest, I definitely recommend for you to go and start from the beginning, Iron Man, and make your way with release date order, then go see Endgame. It is definitely worth it (although I suggest to take your time). It is a fantastic journey and I can’t believe I can say I was alive to witness every single one of them in the theater. Thinking about how lucky I am to have seen all this and how lucky you all are as well makes me have a little lump in my throat right now. As Tony Stark says in the trailer, “Part of the journey is the end.” An incredible journey this end was and I hope it is for all of you as well.


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