I am actually really glad that MAZE RUNNER – THE DEATH CURE ended the trilogy on a pretty WCKD action packed high note. Well, at least to me. Not to the critics it seems. Maybe I was just ultimately disappointed with The Scorch Trials after the memorable first film that anything better would lift my spirits. Maybe I appreciate how this movie wasn’t split into two parts like all the rest of the YA novels turned into movies have been. Maybe my expectations were low. A bunch of different reasons. I just know that this last film in the trilogy really entertained me, was visually stunning to look at, and the action was more than decent. The film is not without its flaws of course (mainly dialogue) but we’ll get to those in a minute.

To just forewarn most of you. I haven’t read the novels and I don’t plan to. I also heard that the movies deviate a crap ton from the novels, so if you are a fan, I don’t know how you are going to take it, it’s just a warning. But if you’ve been following the movies at all, the whole thing is that the world doesn’t have many survivors left due to this disease that basically turns people into these fast zombies (I am intentionally staying away from calling all these nouns proper names because I want to tell it like it is). The government had been setting up these experiments with people they thought were immune to the virus, trying to find a way to extract a cure from them (it’s complicated how they explain this without just trying to turn their blood into a serum, just watch the movie, I’m not going to explain here). Thomas, played by Dylan O’Brien, is our main protagonist, who we see in the first movie sent up to the maze, where we learned his memory was partially wiped and he had worked for the government he is now fighting against (Bourne anyone?). He gets out of the maze with a handful of survivors in the first movie, and in the second movie they lightning dodge and also dodge the creatures…you know what? I don’t remember if there was even a plot in the second movie other than going from point a to point b. I know that they girl he likes, played by Kara Scoledario betrayed them, and took one of the main survivors, Minho, played by Ki Hong Lee, back to base to re experiment on him to get serum.

This movie’s plot is basically two fold: a. Rescue Minho and b. finally take down WCKD. Of course it being the final film in the trilogy there are reveals (like how a character that supposedly died in the first film isn’t dead, I did like how they kept the well known actor out of the marketing campaign for the surprise reveal but if you read his name on the poster it wouldn’t surprise you), more reveals, showdowns, and other predictable things to wrap things up. Needless to say, it wraps everything up the way it should. Yes, it is predictable, and a lot of the dialogue is cliched, “You aren’t going to do this without us,””You can save everyone,””I can save her,””You can’t save her,””This is where it ends,” so on and so forth. The journey is actually very entertaining and the action, spectacle and visuals made it actually a treat to sit and watch in the theater.

Director Wes Ball has a flair for action, he proved it in the last two films but he really proves it with this one. Give him a meaty script and something different and this guy could direct wonders. No joke. The opening train sequence is expertly shot and then when shit goes down in the WCKD city, the action is better than Michael Bay’s incoherent shit. And while the dialogue is bad the acting is at least on par. Dylan O’Brien just needs better movies to display his talent, actually, you know what, every one involved in this need better films to fully show their talent. Walton Goggins has a cool almost unrecognizable minor role as a WCKD city outsider who has plans to get into the city himself and take the government down. And Aiden Gillan, always fantastic in Game of Thrones as Littlefinger, plays a half-way decent villain here, if only he were given more to do and say.

At least this movie went somewhere, unlike The Scorch Trials.The movie drags just a tiny bit in the middle, but the beginning and last hour were spectacularly done. I was fully expecting this to be a Mockingjay ho hum affair, but I actually enjoyed myself, and although I didn’t explain the plot really well above, the movie does a fine job re explaining everything to you. My problems were with the dialogue and I don’t care so much for that this disease basically turns people into zombies, even though they don’t use that word. So here is my final stance on the trilogy. If the first movie hooked you, but you didn’t like the second one, the third one should redeem everything for you. If you aren’t a fan of the series  at all, this film probably won’t change your mind. And if you haven’t seen the other two, don’t see this one as you’ll really have no basis for a lot of what goes on other than a minor rehash in some of the characters dialogue. But yeah, I enjoyed this final part of the maze, and while I enjoyed the first part, but was a little lost in the middle, I would say it is a half way decent trilogy, maybe to be remembered as one of the better YA adaptations that ultimately made the Divergent series look like absolute shit.

Nicholas Cage has his moments. His moments are mainly the ones where he just doesn’t give a fuck about his performance and goes off the wall crazy ass bonkers. Those are his most entertaining roles. Add MOM AND DAD to the list of them. Mom and Dad is playing in few select theaters but you can rent or buy it on VOD right now. I am not a huge fan of direct to VOD, but this movie is an exception. It’s crazy premise, short tight run time, and Nic Cage make this one of the rare good ones. It’s from Brian Taylor, one of the duo of Neveldine/Taylor, who brought you such weird projects as Gamer, Crank, and Crank High Voltage. This is his solo outing, and if you’ve seen any of those fast paced, hyper edited, high premise films, you know what to expect. And you get exactly that.

There is only one thing you need to know about Mom and Dad. It is about some kind of signal that is making Mom and Dads everywhere have the uncontrollable urge to kill their kids, and just their kids, no one else’s. Which actually brought an interesting dynamic to the film. There are some scenes where parents are stopping other parents from killing their kids, but when they get home or see their kids, they go after them anyway with that blood thirsty rage. What I kind of like about the film is that even with that high premise, it is light on plot other than two kids, a brother and sister, trying to escape the clutches of their mom and dad, played by Nicholas Cage and Selma Blair. I’ve already sung the praises of Nicholas Cage here, but Selma Blair is also very exceptional, probably bringing what is her best performance ever, and definitely her best since Cruel Intentions.

If you are one of those ‘Losties” and are looking for answers to the who, what, where, when, and why of this signal and why it is happening, I’m just going to tell you right now to not expect many answers. There are context clues to make you figure everything out and the ending is sort of ambigouis, and not everything is tied up in a nice little bow. This is a movie to just sit back and enjoy the insanity of it. To see Nicholas Cage screaming and singing the Hokey Pokey while he is destroying a pool table with a sledgehammer or his crazy eyes and mannerisms as he runs after his kids. My favorite scene is when he and Selma Blair try to get their kids out of the locked basements by rigging their gas system and jerry-rigging it through a window in the basement.

There is a late and short appearance by Lance Hendrickson that I quite enjoyed as well, but saying anything about that would ruin a pretty good surprise the film has to offer. The movie mixtures horror, comedy, and disturbing very well, and while at some points it gets pretty close to crossing that ‘too far’ line, it doesn’t quite get there. The violence and gore isn’t too bad, as even though parents are killing their kids, we don’t get up close to any of the bloody murders, just shots of bloody knives, keys, and other objects, without actually seeing any of them hit and cut the human body.

Well that’s all I am going to say about this film because it is a short 85 minutes and if I say anything else it might ruin some of the fun. It’s a helluva ride and a return to form for Taylor, who I am still wanting to see a Crank 3 in theaters somewhere down the line. I would even like to see a sequel to this, not necessarily to get the origins of the signal explained, but maybe to expand the universe more and see another side to the mayhem. Hopefully it does well enough to do that. You could start by taking my recommendation and renting it to whatever VOD service you have on a compatible device. Oh, and don’t watch this with your kids. Just sayin’.

If you glance at Gerard Butler’s filmography, you’ll tend to notice a pattern that emerges. To sum it off, the actor is THE definition of hit and miss. It seems like one movie is makes is meh or terrible, and then the next one is quite serviceable or solid while not quite being fantastic or a masterpiece (one could argue the closest he’s ever gotten to that would be 300). For example, in 2009 he had three movies, The Ugly Truth, Law Abiding Citizen, and Gamer. Shitty film, pretty decent, shitty film. Or how about lets go to 2006 to 2008 with 300, P.S. I love You, and RocknRolla. Very good film, shitty film, decently solid. You can do that all over with his career. Now let’s get to present from 2016 to now. You have London Has Fallen, Geostorm, and now DEN OF THIEVES. Not too bad if enjoyable sequel, shitty film, a very, very solid yet not grand heist/crime film. In other words, yes, I am recommending Den of Thieves even though at times it tries to hard to be Michael Mann’s Heat and in some parts, completely rips it off.

What the marketing does very well is not even remotely hint at the huge twist the film has at the end of it. I knew something fishy was going on, but the end result kind of had me stunned. That is all I’m going to say on that matter. The movie stars Gerard Butler as a leader of a Major Crimes Unit Task Force assigned to bring down L.A.’s most successful bank robbery crew. The crew contains a lot of unknowns like Pablo Schreiber, but you might recognize Curtis ’50’ Cent Jackson, who doesn’t really do all that much in the film, and Ice Cube’s clone…errr I mean son, O’shea Jackson Jr., who is becoming quite the figure in films just like his father did. But the movie mainly works because of Gerard Butler, who is so fucking good in this, I have rarely seen him better. This is probably his best performance and one alongside Leonidas and Mike Banning that I’ll probably remember forever. He sold me with his first scene, and just kept selling me and selling me each and every scene after that.

The film is actually pretty enjoyable, and at 2 hours and 20 minutes, I didn’t feel it at all. Sure, there were some unnecessary scenes that could’ve been trimmed. I really didn’t need Gerard Butler’s characters’ family life brought into this, all it did was kind of assure the audience that while he is good at his job and not dirty as a cop, he makes his life dirty by cheating on his wife, but then is really nice to his kids. Instead of unnecessary scenes that sort of dragged down the movie a bit, it could’ve been explained in one line of dialogue. Yeah, that’s 20 minutes right there that could’ve been cut. Although I did like the scene where he signs his wife’s divorce papers. I understand what they were trying to do, bring some humanity and flaws to his character, but they were too cliched and just really didn’t work.

Come to think of it, there really isn’t that much characterization in the film. There is one scene with the criminals family life that feels like a rip off of a better scene in Bad Boys II (you’ll know it when you see it). You see them with their family and that is it, that one little scene, and then you really don’t see them again, and why bring them into it if you aren’t going to show their reactions to the fates of some of the characters at the end of the film? What was the point of their scenes? The acting is good, just the writing in of some scenes to bring some background to the characters seemed really last minute, although O’Shea Jackson Jr.’s character gets a little bit interesting in the 2nd half of the film. Also, a lot of the scenes and interactions of the characters feel too much like Michael Mann’s film Heat and even comes close to completely ripping some of those scenes off.

Ok, this doesn’t seem like a recommendation review does it? Let’s get to the good stuff. The film is very entertaining. The last 40-45 minutes along where a heist takes place is so solid that I could just watch those 45 minutes as an amazing little action-y mini film. The tension is brought to a high level and I didn’t have a clue to what was going to happen next. The film made me think, “wait, weren’t they going to try and rob the federal reserve? what are they doing here?” Everything in those last 45 minutes comes together so beautifully, I was wondering why this film was dumped in January. Seems more like a decent late March or April film to me. Definitely not in the same league as 12 Strong or Insidious 4. After seeing the crap action in 12 Strong, it was refreshing to see a first time director, Christian Gudegast, take his experience from writing films and takes his vision and actually control the camera correctly and film some very strong action scenes.

That along with Gerard Butler, I am recommending this crazy little heist flick even though Rotten Tomatoes and a lot of critics really, really disagree with me. My friend Kim, who sees a lot of films with me, her “ass out to pass out” rule always in effect, she was on the edge of her seat the entire time, didn’t even nudge her ass out a little to the left or right once. Oh, and the twist, loved the twist. It’s definitely a film I plan on watching again, it is really that enjoyable and fun. And sometimes, fun is all I ask for.

Let’s cut to the chase: 12 STRONG isn’t very good. In fact, it is the definition of a “January War Film.” What is that you might ask? It’s where everyone involved opens the 101 playbook entitled “How To Make A Barely Passable War Film That Will Please Studio Executives Enough For A Theatrical Release That Will Also Please Modern Audiences.” They take what is a great heroic story and completely Hollywood Bastardize it to the point of ‘meh.’ This is one of only a handful of war films where I’ve yawn several times throughout. The entire production is just plain lazy. Characterization, dialogue, even the action sequences are shot poorly. What is so damn frustrating is that there is a Academy Award nominated film somewhere in this true story. This film takes that away like Sophie’s choice.

In fact, this film could be lazy enough in my opinion as to be disrespectful to the soldiers that actually went through the mission. And I know when it says ‘Based On A True Story’ it means that a lot of what happened is going to be taken for granted, a lot of filler put in, and some false stuff that didn’t happen. This is more of ‘Hardly Based On A True Story If Told By A Lazy Michael Bay.’ By the way, yes Jerry Bruckheimer produced this but Michael Bay didn’t direct it. What is sad to say is that if he had, it might’ve been a better film. The action is just piss poor. How do I explain the action? You know that gag in The Naked Gun series, where Leslie Nielsen and a henchmen are both hiding behind a box shooting at each other, and then the camera pulls back to show the depth of field was that great and they are really right next to each other? That’s how the movie felt. Cut to American soldier shooting, cut to Taliban soldier shooting, show them kind of shooting up close, rinse, repeat. You can’t tell who is where and who is doing or shooting what, it is just kind of a hugely shot and edited mess. There are only two decent shots in the film, the Taliban firing off rockets, and Chris Hemworth shooting and his fallen horse getting up in a cool little sped up take. That’s it.

If you have no clue what the story is about the film tries to tell the tale about 12 American soldiers that group up with General Dotsum and his men, who is the leader of the alliance in Afganistan and is actually now the Vice President (so guess what? he doesn’t die!), and try to cut off the Taliban’s supply line. Like the trailers tell you, it’s the first great victory in the Afghan war right after 9/11, so the trailers kind of spoil you in how it is going to turn out, then again you could just go on Wikipedia and read about it. Which is the alternative I recommend than going to see this movie. Even though we have 12 American Soldiers and General Dotsum, there  isn’t that much characterization in the film. In fact, it is hard to distinguish who is who trait wise other than seeing a bunch of pretty actors who’s faces we recognize. The only personality that sort of shines is General Dotsum, but then he is bogged down in cliched dialogue saying, “this is much country, this is my army, this is my land, this is my honor, these are my morals” type speeches. He tell Chris Hemworth at the end, “I will always think of you as my brother,” however the movie didn’t fucking earn that emotional sentence for the audience at the end. The sentence was a plot convenience.

Other terrible dialogue too, with the soldiers trying to be funny, everything we’ve heard of before such as: “What are you trying to do so-and-so, get a tan?””The war has just started boys.””I promised my wife I would make it home.” So on and so forth, just plain lazy writing because the writers either don’t have the skill to write good dialogue or they were trying to meet a fast deadline. I’m guessing a little bit of both. While they’re dialogue is supposed to be funny the only humorous part of the movie is that Chris Hemworth’s real wife in real life plays his wife in this. That’s the only chuckle the movie got out of me.

The plot structure is an entire mess. For example, there is this whole five minute scene of Chris Hemsworth telling that a few of his men need to make this long and perilous journey through this valley with harsh conditions (no water, food etc.) so they can get to the other side of the Taliban undetected and cut off that part of the supply line while Chris Hemsworth and his men destroy the other side to box him in. 5 minutes of saying, “I can’t order you guys to do this so I need volunteers.” Michael Pena steps up and says, “yes you can sir, you can order us to do it.” So dramatic, he orders Michael Pena to go, he picks two guys, they say their cliched goodbyes. So you think we are going to see these three soldiers and some of the harshness right? Nope. One scene of them finding a guy and his goats and them trying to buy one of the goats for food. And that’s it, and they are where they need to be with only chapped lips. I mean come on? You set up a 5 minute dramatic scene, not wanting to order your soldiers to trek with these harsh conditions and you end up showing only one scene of them buying a goat? LAZY AS FUCK.

And don’t get me started how you have a great actor like Michael Shannon in this and relegate him to little more than a cameo. He is barely fucking in this picture, and he’s out of it due to his location or that he fucked up his back somehow. He is brought back near the very end and gets pretty injured but the movie doesn’t focus on him enough and give him some character for me to really care about him. When I read their journey in news stories or wikipedia, I care about the real soldiers. The movie should emulate that. It doesn’t. And if  you notice I haven’t played up the whole horse soldier angle. Because other than them riding the horses and shooting their guns while riding them, there are no scenes of them bonding with the horses and only one scene of them learning to kind of ride them real quick plays off as humorous. So yeah the whole marketing of horse soldiers doesn’t pay off either. So instead of making a joke that 12 Strong really should be called 12 Weak, or 12 Yawns, or 12 Naps or whatever, I’m just going to tell you to skip this movie and wait for the retelling that is one day going to happen because Hollywood doesn’t know how to tell a fresh narrative about 9/11 anymore.

Ah yes! Finally! After seeing Phantom Thread this weekend I can now finalize and publish my TOP TEN FILMS OF 2017….well, and 40 others that I thought worth mentioning. But the reason it is my top ten list  is because I provide commentary on just those ten about why they are on my ten best of the 2017 list. So if you just want to read about my top ten, scroll really fast through these other 40 and you’ll see that I wrote a paragraph each on the top ones and why they are so special to me, enjoy!

50. The Babysitter

49. The Belko Experiment

48. Kong: Skull Island

47. Girls Trip

46. Mayhem

45. Alien: Covenant

44. The Fate of the Furious

43. Justice League

42. The Foreigner

41. American Assassin

40. Happy Death Day

39. Kingsman: The Golden Circle

38. I, Tonya

37. Darkest Hour

36. The Florida Project

35. Phantom Thread

34. Logan Lucky

33. The Greatest Showman

32. Jumanji: Welcome To The Jungle

31. Detroit

30. The Shape of Water

29. The Disaster Artist

28. Only The brave

27. American Made

26. Wonder

25. Thor: Rognarok

24. Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

23. Coco

22. Wind River

21. Mudbound

20. Lady Bird

19. Split

18. Better Watch Out

17. Get Out

16. The Big Sick

15. Good Time

14. War For The Planet of the Apes

13. Spider-Man: Homecoming

12. Baby Driver

11. Wonder Woman

AND FINALLY, MY TOP TEN WITH A TINY BIT OF COMMENTARY FOR EACH::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

10. THREE BILLBOARDS OUTSIDE EBBING, MISSOURI

Probably the most original film of the year. Great script, great story, great ending, great dialogue, incredible acting, unpredictable. All the ingredients to make a more than memorable movie. Sam Rockwell and Frances McDormand deserve the Oscars they are probably going to get for this. And Martin McDonough should win for Original Screenplay. I kept switching this and Wonder Woman for the ten spot, constantly, but I ultimately chose this because Wonder Woman’s ending is a little bit of a let down considering all that came before.

9. LOGAN

Easily the best comic book film of the year. I know a lot of you thought Wonder Woman was better but no, Hugh Jackman made this film. His best performance as Wolverine and one of his best performances period. A modern day comic book western that was a visual and mental feast from minute one until it ended. A rated R Wolverine film that everyone deserved. In a sane world, Patrick Stewart would be nominated for playing Professor X in this. But we don’t live in a sane world.

8. HOSTILES

I love Westerns, and even though we could argue that Logan is a true Western, Hostiles is the true western of the year, and the best western since Dances With Wolves. An incredible, unpredictable journey where Christian Bale I thought gave his best performance ever, or at least the best since American Psycho. It is a visual treat from beginning to end and I loved the way the film visited not the right or wrong, but the darkness of the grey of humanities choices. Masterful.

7. THE POST

I knew I was going to like this new Spielberg film but I didn’t know I was going to really really really really love it. I think this is the first Spielberg film I have had on my top ten list since Munich. And it is his best film since Munich. He could’ve just made this a point and shoot affair, but with a smart and snappy script about the Pentagon papers, and with incredible actors like Hanks and Streep, you can tell that Spielberg wanted to be behind the camera, for he shows us all his signature moves and adds a few new ones in the process.

6. IT

Hi ya Georgie! While I can now admit that the film isn’t all that scary, it still is a fantastic film that I can watch over and over due to the almost perfect story adaptation from Stephen King’s book, and the best child group acting in decades. Plus, that first scene with Georgie and Pennywise in the sewer is near perfection. This make the TV special that aired in 1990 look like it was made by film students. I’ve seen this about 4 times now and enjoy it more very time.

5. MOLLY’S GAME

Some of Aaron Sorkin’s best dialogue, and my favorite Jessica Chastain performance since The Help. The story switches back between past and present so seamlessly that it doesn’t treat the audience like they are idiots with stupid “this is whenever” title cards before each scene. For a film that is 2 hour and 20 minutes long, it felt like a crisp 90 minutes. And that is extremely hard to do with everyone being fidgety nowadays.

4. JOHN WICK CHAPTER 2

I honestly thought this was going to be a permanent number 2 on my list since February 2017, but the next three films blew me away even more than this one did. And this is one of the best action sequels every made and so much better than the first film. It does everything a sequel should do. It expands the story and the universe, it ups the action, and it is more fun. Keanu Reeves looks happy to be there and does all his own stunts. And it is honestly probably because he wants to be known for this series when he dies and not just Ted from Bill & Ted. With film #2, he’s already succeeded with that wish.

3. DUNKIRK

Another Christopher Nolan masterpiece. And it is probably because of Han Zimmer’s score. I never thought a PG-13 war film could work, but this one does. And yes, I saw it in 70 mm IMAX when it came out and watching it on video isn’t as breathtaking to be sure, but it is still a masterpiece, a masterful movie to watch over and over again. When the film starts, you grip your arm rests or whatever you have near you and don’t let go until the end credits. The most tense film of the year.

2. BLADE RUNNER 2049

Yes, the first film back in the 80s I believe is highly overrated. Harrison Ford plays a detective that doesn’t really do any detective work, and doesn’t really do much in the story. But this film is better and bigger in almost every single way. It’s a visual masterpiece for the mind, body, and soul, and it happens to accompany a pretty interesting story where Ryan Gosling actually does a shit ton of detective work. When I was in the theater I had just a sense of extreme awe the entire time and I can’t wait to revisit the film again when it comes out on Blu-Ray tomorrow.

1. STAR WARS EPISODE VIII: THE LAST JEDI

Look, I could defend this film until kingdom come. Oh, you didn’t like Luke’s story did you? Felt like it ruined his character and your childhood did it? Look, that was the only way the story and writer/director Rian Johnson could go after J.J. Abrams set everything up. If Luke hadn’t cut himself off from the force, he probably would’ve had a vision of Han being killed by Ben and would’ve went after him and saved him just like when he had that vision of Cloud City training with Yoda…ah ah ah, I’ll stop, if I don’t I’ll just keep going. This film is a masterpiece and the best Star Wars film since The Empire Strikes Back. Everything about it is almost pitch perfect, because it does what Luke says, “this isn’t going to go the way you think.” None of it does. Who saw Snoke being killed in part two of the new trilogy? That fight scene with Rey and Ben fighting off his guards is one of the best action sequences in the entire series. The beginning space battle with the bombers to the First Order dreadnought is perfect. The humor did bother me a little bit at first, and the Leia Mary Poppins thing, but I’ve seen the film several times now, and I enjoy it more each time, and those parts don’t even phase me anymore. The ending with Luke and Ben and the “See you around kid” floors me every single time. I love everything about this film, even the journey to Canto Bight. So I don’t mind defending this film until kingdom come. I feel like a young excited kid every time I watch it, and tears well up in my eyes when it ends. It is that great of a film to me, and in the end, the over obnoxious “not my Star Wars” fanboys can go fuck themselves.

Thanks for reading and PEACE OUT!!!!

 

Finally, a Paul Thomas Anderson film that I can actually tolerate and actually enjoyed and mostly thought was very good. I don’t think I’ve liked a Paul Thomas Anderson film since Punch-Drunk Love and this is his best film since Boogie Nights. To let you know if you can stand to read the rest of this review, especially those Paul Thomas Anderson fanatics out there, I can’t stand Magnolia, The Master, There Will Be Blood, and Inherent Vice (I haven’t seen Hard Eight). And it’s not that his films are terrible. I know I can be accused of calling his previous films ‘beautiful garbage,’ but I think now I can tell you that I can’t stand his films because I just honestly don’t get him. Well, with PHANTOM THREAD, I think I kind of understand him now, other than that I really didn’t care for the 3rd act of this film, especially the last 15 minutes.

But the rest of the film is near note perfect. The acting, the cinematography, the music (oh God yes the music), the fashion, most of the story, everything is really beautiful, and not beautiful garbage, genuinely beautiful. I might need to watch it again to really figure out why the last 15 minutes didn’t work for me, but they didn’t work for me  enough to make me hate or not stand the film (if you check my top 50 list this film is in there, while most of his other films have been on my worst list the year they have come out). I just don’t think the last 15 minutes matched the rest of the film. It tries to pull a kind of a Woody Allen’s Match Point sort of ending, and it trips and stumbles instead of sticks the landing.

Ok, ok, most of you that aren’t cinephiles are probably asking, “what is this movie Phantom Thread?” Well, first of all, it is supposed to be the great actor Daniel Day Lewis’ final film, because he is retiring from acting (we will see how long that lasts, anyone that says that misses it, and ends up coming back in 5 to 7 years). And the movie takes place in the 1950’s, and he plays a OCD dressmaker named Reynold Woodcock, where anyone that is anyone with money comes to him and his sister for them to make a dress for a requested occasion. He goes through women like Tic Tacs, loving and obsessed with them so much at first and then dump them at the first sign of annoyance. But then he meets a waitress named Alma, a woman that tries to permanently disrupt his perfectly tailored life and be the one woman he just can’t get rid of.

That’s about all I am going to say, because if I say any more, I would ruin the last crucial 30 minutes of the film. And like I said, really only the last fifteen minutes I didn’t care for. Paul Thomas Anderson does something that is actually pretty intriguing at first, and the story gets even more interesting than it already was. But then that thing is brought up again and the reactions, decisions, and ultimate climax motivations of the characters take another turn that I didn’t necessarily think matched with the rest of the film. But that’s probably just me. I think it could’ve went a lot of interesting ways, but instead told a too convenient easy, weird, and disturbing way out. Oh well. Like I said, it might work for you. *shrugs*

But the rest of the film is great. The actress that plays Alma (Vicky Krieps) is absolutely sensational, and I don’t understand why she isn’t getting any Oscar buzz this year. Every facial expression, look, and body movement is precisely calculated and she is extraordinary to watch. And of course, if this is Daniel Day Lewis’ final film, he goes out on a high note. He plays the OCD Reynolds Woodcock to perfection. Daniel Day Lewis absolutely sinks into this role, just like he does every other role, and while he did win the Oscar for Lincoln and My Left Foot, I think his performance here is even better. In fact, even though I didn’t like There Will Be Blood, his performance here is on par with that. Masterful. A class act. If this is his final film, he will e truly missed.

And I’ll repeat it again, the rest of the film is quite beautiful and sometimes even mesmerizing and hilarious. England in the 50s is shot to perfection. There is this scene where Reynolds and Alma try to get one of his dresses back from this debutante who is being a bit of a ditsy drunk at her own wedding and is disrespecting the dress. It is my favorite scene in the film and that and a handful of other scenes are just that great to watch. It is just a shame those last 15 minutes didn’t work. Otherwise it could’ve been higher and maybe even hit my top ten list. But I think the real breakthrough here is that I didn’t hate another Paul Thomas Anderson film. I don’t know what it is to you, but to me its a miracle among modern science. It is almost like me not thinking a Uwe Boll is terrible. BAHAHAHAHAHAHA, sorry about that will never happen.

At this point, could we all just say that Liam Neeson is the higher quality Chuck Norris? I’m frankly surprised their are not as many Neeson jokes/memes/gifs as there are Norris by now. Not counting A Walk Among The Tombstones, Mark Felt, and The Grey, you pretty much know what to expect when walking into a Liam Neeson high-octane action pic. You have your high end ones, like Taken, you have your low end ones, like the Taken sequels, and then you have your very enjoyable turn off your brain middle fare, such as Unknown, Non-Stop and Run All Night. Thankfully, THE COMMUTER is in that latter category.  What is a little funny about this movie pun wise, is that the movie is actually two thirds really really strong before….derailing into lunacy in its final act. But even the derailment is fun and combined with the entire journey, I had a pretty good Neeson of a time.

This honestly could’ve been a sequel to Non-Stop, and I don’t understand why it wasn’t. If you don’t know what Non-Stop was, it was basically Liam Neeson as a air marshal trying to find a potential terrorist on a airplane. The entire movie took place on said airplane, and spoiler alert, Neeson survives the movie. In The Commuter he plays an ex-cop that just got fired from his insurance sales gig he had for ten years, only to be offered by a mystery woman (played by Bates Hotel’s Vera Farmiga) who offers him $100,000 to find a person on a train before a certain stop and tag his/her luggage with a GPS device. So why couldn’t they have said he was an ex-air marshal and just make this a cool little sequel to Non-Stop, ten years later? Who knows, and I guess who cares? I mean, with Liam Neeson’s good but very typecast acting, he basically plays the same character in all these movies (with the except of the three non-actioner movies I mentioned in the first paragraph).

But the movie is fun. It’s fun to watch Neeson using his authority cop like special skills to try and find this specific passenger and I did enjoy several of the mid act twists that I didn’t see coming. The acting and some of the situations with the other passengers get to be a little on the ridiculous side with some of the “secrets” they are hiding, especially in the third act, but all is forgiven because the movie is a solid entertaining 1 hr and 44 minutes that doesn’t let up. And the third act does get a little Looney Tune-y action wise and a couple of more plot twists are thrown at you that I saw coming from minute one, but as that stuff usually bothers me with other films, there is just something about a Liam Neeson actioner where I just put my hands behind my head, relax, and just say, “I’m smiling, I’m having fun, I just don’t give a fuck.”

I mentioned that Vera Farmiga is in this movie above, but if you are going to see the movie because you are a fan of her, word of warning. She is only physically present in two scenes and then is a voice on the phone the rest of the movie. It screams paycheck and that she was on a lot filming something else close by. Sam Neil is relegated to a shock cameo status and Patrick Wilson has a bit more to do but seems like he was on autopilot, phoning it in. But Liam Neeson actually looks like he wants to be there this time. He does his Neeson thing but everything about his performance, while typecast, was enjoyable and believable.

So if you want a good time at the movies for a January, which is usually a dump month studio movie ground for shitty films (except for the ones released limited in December and expand in January), this film is for you. For its bug fuck nuts craziness and fun factor, I would compare this film to the third XXX feature with Vin Diesel that we got last January. To enjoy these kinds of films, you just have to turn your brain off and try not to decipher and pick apart everything for one time out of the year. 2017 was XXX The Return of Xander Cage, 2018 is The Commuter.

 

HOSTILES is easily the best Western since Dances With Wolves. It also ranks as one of my favorite westerns of all time, including other films such as 3:10 To Yuma (the remake), True Grit (the remake & original), The Outlaw Josey Wales, Django Unchained, The Quick and The Dead and Unforgiven. While there are hundreds of movies of what is right and what is wrong, this film takes it to the next level by also exploring the deep darkness of grey in between. Christian Bale also gives his best performance since The Figher and may I even say it is up there as maybe his best performance ever for me. This western tale is gritty, its unpredictable, its journey is dark and takes you places you didn’t think you would go, it tugs at your heart strings and won’t let go, and the final shot left me with some choked back tears. It not just making me have to revise my top ten of 2017 list yet again, but it is also making me revise my western masterpiece list.

Since you most likely haven’t seen any promotional material for this film since it was picked up by a distributor so late and at the last minute to qualify for this year’s Academy Awards, let me give you a non spoiler-y run down: All you need to know is that its about a Army captain (Christian Bale) in 1892, that has had the job for the last little while, tracking down rogue Native Americans and jailing them in some fort stronghold.  One of these is a Cheyenne war chief (Wes Studi) that has been jailed for 7 years and by the decree of the President of the United States, as a sort of public relations good faith sort of gesture, orders his release, and for Bale’s Army captain to escort him back to his original native land. Bale is reluctant to do it because this certain Cheyenne war chief and his tribe has killed many of his friends, but for the sake of his pension and future retirement, he does it anyway. He leads a group of troops to get the chief and his family back to his land and along the way picks up a woman who’s family was just slaughter by a rogue batch of Native Americans that show no mercy.

The movie is called Hostiles because mainly the dark path it takes is to show that hostility can come from anyone. Christian Bale’s character, although a good man, is deeply flawed, and his arc in this 2 hour and 15 minute film is not as predictable and you might imagine. Not everything is clear cut. His feelings for certain aspects of what is is doing changes, but he still remembers and respects his original intuitions. It’s not a full 180 character moral flip. His character is fully enveloped in that dark grey between right and wrong and Bale’s way of portraying this character as one trying to sort that grey out into something coherent is astonishingly masterful. Rosamund Pike also delivers one of her career best performances right alongside Gone Girl as that woman with PTSD the entire film of seeing her entire family slaughtered right before her eyes. All of her actions and reactions are painstakingly realistic.

This film is actually a pretty star studded affair. Ben Foster plays another devilish role that basically flashes a “HEY LOOK EVERYONE, WE WERE BOTH IN THAT AWESOME REMAKE 3:10 TO YUMA!” sign but not really as his role, while brief, is a little more complicated than that role in that other fantastic western. Jesse Plemons, Adam Beach, Rory Chochran, Call Me By Your Name’s and Lady Bird’s Timothy Chalamet, Scott Wilson, and Stephen Lang round up the cast. And they all give fantastic performances. The cinematography in this western is amazing as well. The valleys, the mountains, the forests, the landscapes, all captured perfectly on camera to give you that feel you are out in the wilderness in 1892. Every single shot is breathtakingly beautiful to look at.

I love that this film is not just one plot, but multiple B, C, and even D plots as it goes. All of them tie in together quite harmoniously and bring the film to a brutal, calculated, yet unpredictable journey. The film is brutal when it needs to be and doesn’t over complicate or over saturate the plot with needless shots of blood, guts, or other cheap ways to make your stomach churn. Writer and Director Scott Cooper does a fantastic job to relay the right message about humanity without any cheap one-two punches that feel inauthentic to the audience. For example, there is some scalping in the film, but unlike Quentin Tarantino in Inglourious Basterds where it does a long close up take of the scalping to try and for a wince like emotion, here it is fast, to the point, and on to the next scene to show you why some men are savages and hostile.

I just love Hostiles. I was in love with it about 10 minutes in and was crossing my fingers that nothing else let me down. Thank goodness it didn’t. It’s unpredictability floored me to no end. Even though it is a slow boiler it kept my attention aptly for the entire run time. One think to know about me is I love Westerns. LOVE Westerns. Just something about that old time, with cowboys, native americans, shootouts, the vast valley of endless land, the setting that just keeps my attention and absorbs everything it has to offer. I know a lot of people out there that don’t like Westerns, and that is fine. But I encourage you to let go of your hostility and maybe give it a chance even though it isn’t your taste. But if you are like me and appreciate the once in a blue moon fantastic one like this, you are in for a treat.

 

Writer/directors James Wan and Leigh Whannell are responsible for creating two key horror franchises in the past decade: the Saw series, and the Insidious series. While the Saw series I could honestly watch endlessly, where every new installment I graciously look forward to, the Insidious series unfortunately goes the opposite way, along the likes of the Paranormal Activity series, in that I kind of wish it were to stop now before it really really overstays its welcome. It’s not that INSIDIOUS: THE LAST KEY is horrible. No, it’s actually not bad for a January release and there are some general frightening moments, it more than likely that for me all the tension is taken out of the film, due to the fact that it is a prequel and I know certain characters will make it out alive so when they are in danger I really don’t give a shit.

What is this trend that we are getting into with horror movies? We have one or two original films, the sequel taking place after the first one, but then we get into prequel territory (sometimes right away with installment 2) because the filmmakers think the audience will give them several pats on the back if they completely connect to the original film in the end. While it was cool for Ouija 2, then shrug worthy with Annabelle 2, it has now become groan inducing. We get it, “ohhhhhhhhhh this shit is so cool it literally picks up where the first one starts!!!” Ummmm….to quote myself, “who fucking cares?” I don’t like prequels in general. Prequels take all the fun out of everything because there are literally no stakes; with the plot or the characters, etc.  We know what eventually happens to the characters. There is the one in ten film prequel journey that makes up for the lost tension, but it is very, very rare.

Ouija: Origin of Evil is one of those. Ouija 2 (but really a prequel) only worked because that it was so good it made the shitty first film look like Gigli. Annabelle kind of works because again, the first film was really shitty and the 2nd film is a minor improvement. Insidious The Last Key is not even close to an improvement over any of the previous films. In fact, after the first film, all the films deteriorate one after the other in terms of quality. Yes, we know that Lin Shaye is usually a good actress, and she was the highlight of the first movie and the only thing redeemable about #3, but in this one, to see her origin story, ehhhh…I didn’t really care. Her origin story is unfortunately relegated to the fact that her daddy is an abusive asshole and doesn’t believe in ghosts so he beats his daughter whenever she says she sees them or talks about her gift or whatever. Certainly writer Leigh Whannell could come up with something better than that.

The film does manage to come up with a couple of twists that I didn’t quite see coming although many of you probably could. And I did jump several times…although I am getting sick of that spirit villain that looks like the arch nemesis of the Powerpuff Girls. And another part of the movie I don’t like is that I just don’t care about The Further anymore. Although the Further came first, it is basically just a rich man’s Stranger Things’ Upside Down with rooms. And while the Upside Down in Stranger Things has established rules, it seems like anything can happen in The Further if it is a plot convenience to get the characters from point A to point B and then they think they are safe at point C. So to some up everything I’m saying in a nice little bow here, the movie is okay, not terrible, not great, I’m just sick of the prequel story nonsense, want a sequel and want more genuine scares.

I still do kind of like Lin Shaye’s sidekicks in the film, played by Angus Sampson and Leigh Whannell himself, they are given more to do here, but a lot of their jokes fall completely flat, their charm being the only thing that keeps them memorable. If they make a 5th movie, if the charm goes away, so does my affection for the characters. And the probably will make a 5th movie, seeing that this new one, in one weekend, made back 3 to 5 times it’s budget already. The only way I would care about a 5th movie, is if it is a sequel to part 2. I’m tired of the prequels. I know what Lin Shaye’s character can do, I now know how she started the Spectral Sightings business with her two sidekicks and now I know her origin story as a child. That is enough. Lin Shaye’s story is over, let’s go further into the dark side of The Further and bring about true nightmares again. We should all go by the wise recent words of Kylo Ren, “Let the past die, kill it if you have to.” Time to kill the prequels to Insidious and movie on to true sequels. Otherwise I will not longer go into The Further with the rest of you.

Rank of Insidious Movies:

1. Insidious
2. Insidious Chapter 2
3. Insidious Chapter 3
4. Insidious The Last Key

Timeline wise how to watch them:

Insidious Chapter 3

Insidious The Last Key

Insidious

Insidious Chapter 2

(stupid right?)

 

I had so much fun doing my Worst List rhymes,

I’ll do it again, but instead ring this films’ chimes,

THE POST is incredible, there is no doubt about that,

Assume at this point, Spielberg can direct at the drop of a hat,

But little did I know it would be his best since Munich,

He has had some films where he was wearing his ‘meh’ tunic,

For this one, all his incredible talent shows up on the screen,

His signature moves, his crystal clear movie magic sheen,

This true story is set during the Nixon/Vietnam era in 1971,

The Pentagon Papers about to set the world to stun,

The New York Times technically printed about it first,

But the government tried to stop it, politics at its worst,

Enter The Washington Post, who ended up with the papers as well,

Head honchos Kay Graham and Ben Bradlee, needing a story to tell,

They defied all odds because the freedom of the press was at stake,

1st Amendment rights had to be protected, shake the world awake,

This film is so well made, the story spectacularly told,

Tom Hands and Meryl Streep brought in to add to the mold,

Their acting here is top notch, some of the best in their careers,

They deserve to be nominated, deserving of all the critic’s cheers,

The supporting actors were great here too, everyone on the ball,

Standout being Bob Odenkirk, who you know from Better Call Saul,

But the real stars here are Spielberg and the fantastic script,

The dialogue fast and edgy, all quip and nothing clipped,

Spielberg’s camera shots are a sight to behold,

When he did his famous ‘circle shot’, I was perfectly sold,

That this is easily one of the years’ ten best, a movie for our time,

Donald Trump will hate this film, and with that I’m more than fine.