Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: WAVES (no spoilers)

WAVES is a film playing in limited theaters that is starting to get some Oscar attention late in the game. So naturally I went to see it to check it off my potential nominations list (btw, I’m not doing the full thing like I did last year, only thing I want checked off the list as a whole are the Best Picture nominees). It is actually a really beautiful film about the choices we make and the “waves” of reverberation it has on those around us. The consequences more specifically. While the film is a whole, it is unique by completely switching gears (thankfully not jarringly) a little more than halfway into the film, into another character’s perspective. And the first half will have you nervous what is in store for the characters, while the second half will calm that nerve down but make you a little bit more emotional. With my critique of the film as a whole, I do have to say that one half of the movie works better than the other (the first), but that isn’t to say that the film falters in anyway, it’s just a personal opinion of what worked for me. If you like family dramas with a little bit more of a bite, an edge, this is probably right up your alley. I can tell you that the movie really makes you think about what could happen to you in a flash because of a major split second mistake.

And the film is gorgeously shot too, changing aspect ratios several times based upon the mood of the movie. It was written and directed by Trey Edward Shults, whose only done three films, and I’ve only seen one of the other two, It Comes At Night, and I didn’t really care for it at all. This film shows his true potential. Another thing that makes this film stand out is the fantastic score by Academy Award winners Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross, who won a well deserved statue for scoring 2010’s The Social Network. Their work here is nothing short of amazing as well, and I hope that maybe it can sneak into the Best Original Score race come next month when Oscar nominations are announced. What is the movie about? Well, to not get into any spoilers, let’s just say it deals with a family, specifically the brother and the sister. The brother is a praised high school senior athlete, in wrestling, who finds out he has a major, major problem with his shoulder…and his sister, a grade or two below him, stands way under his shadow, but starts to find love with a boy, played by Lucas Hedges. Their father, played by Sterling K. Brown, while a good man, maybe pushes the brother too hard while neglecting the sister a little. And that’s all you need to know. Anything else and the film is completely spoiled.

But it’s a solid movie. The first half is extremely tense, while the second half will probably make you cry Niagara Falls. I expected one of the outcomes of the perspectives to be much worse in my head than what happened on screen, but thinking back on it, that was me just trying to come up with the worst situation possible, and not in regards to what would make a good story or work with the narrative. The acting here also elevates the movie into something that is definitely worth checking out. Sterling K. Brown we all know is a fantastic acting, having already won several Emmy for his work on This Is Us and American Crime Story, and here is he just as good. Maybe not Oscar caliber yet, but extremely close. Lucas Hedges, who has been in a shit ton since being nominated for supporting in Manchester By The Sea, is great here too, playing the sister’s shy love interest. The Oscar caliber performances come from the two playing the brother and sister, Kevin Harrison Jr. (only good part of It Comes At Night) and Taylor Russell (the main girl from Escape Room). Again, without spoiling anything, both of their performances are riveting and heartbreaking. Any other year, they’d be more in the Oscar conversation. But yeah, good film, not much more to say on it, other than what I’ve already said: a solid family drama that makes you think, and will make you think harder with the choices you make in the future.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: QUEEN & SLIM (minor spoilers)

While I enjoyed QUEEN & SLIM enough to give it a minor recommendation, mainly because of Daniel Kaluuya’s incredible fucking acting (he’s this generations Denzel, this man will eventually win an Oscar one day, believe you me), the motivation for the Queen character to make them both run away from the scene of the cop shooting (especially since it was recorded on the dash cam and you can clearly see it is self defense) dumbfounded the shit out of me. Especially considering her occupation (a respected attorney) and the fact that she reveals she got a black man off a murder charge before (citing it was an accident, and one could argue that their situation was an accident as well). I couldn’t wrap my mind around it. Surely there could’ve been a way to get Slim off via self defense and even more so when they eventually find out the cop had killed an innocent black man before and got off scott free. But no, she makes them go on the lam, when he was wanting to stay at the scene of the incident first place. It just seemed to me to be a bullshit excuse to get the plot rolling, otherwise you would have no movie. Actually, not quite true, them going on trial could’ve been a fantastic legal thriller. Anyways, that main issue, another hiding out issue, plus a couple of weird comedic moments (with a story like this they felt extremely out of place) kept me enjoying the movie to its fullest extent. But their travels, the acting between the two leads, and the ultimate message of the film won me over in the end, but probably not for a second viewing.

If you don’t know the story (you could put my context clues together and figure it out) but two individuals (Queen & Slim) first date takes an unexpected turn when a police officer pulls them over. The police officer goes too far multiple times with the situation, is a white racist asshole, and ends up shooting at Queen, and when Slim gets into a tussle with the officer trying to protect her, he ends up with the officers gun and shoots the asshole in the head. Queen gets Slim to run off with her and they must find a way to keep one step ahead of the police and get out of the country (to Cuba). That set up is a great one. You have conflict, a strong message on police racism and brutality, you got suspense, making it look like self defense makes you care and root for the characters. So what exactly went wrong? I’d point it down to the screenplay having Queen’s occupation being an attorney. Her thinking in just running away from the scene makes absolutely no fucking sense whatever. The whole film I kept waiting for the true motivation for why she really fled the scene and the movie didn’t give it to me. In fact, it kept giving me reasons (combined with the one listed in the first paragraph) that made me even more dumbfounded than I was before. Took me completely out of the film. Her occupation led me to another problem I had with the movie. They go out and hide at her uncle’s for a day and a half. Her being a respected attorney, there is no way they could’ve gotten away staying there for that long. Especially when it reveals that the damn uncle was her first law case and she got him off a murder charge. Wouldn’t have the police looked into relative history right off the bat and sent troops there to check on the house? I mean, come on.

There are also a couple of comedic moments, one that takes place at a burger joint, the other Bokeem Woodbine’s over-the-top acting, that took me out of the film again. Those two moments just didn’t feel to me to be appropriate for the trauma that the two characters were going through. I understand those were created to have some comedic relief moments for not just the characters plight, but for the audience to also take a breather. What confuses me are that there are other, better little moments of lightness the characters experience, like at a dance joint and riding a horse, that fit in with the narrative more more perfectly than the other two unnecessary instances of humor. To me, those two parts could’ve been re written more to fit with those other “relief” moments. That’s probably just going to be my opinion on that though. You’ll probably find those parts hilarious and laugh your ass off. They just didn’t gel for me when I was trying to get into the seriousness of the central conflict. Damn, it seems like I’m getting on to this film a little too much, so let me quickly get to the stuff that did work. Most of the dialogue works very well, even if you didn’t have the excellent chemistry between Daniel Kaluuya and newcomer Jodie-Turner Smith. Lena Waithe, mostly known as an actress, proves that she has some pretty damn good writing chops, even with my conflicting feelings about the initial running away motivation of the Queen character. It actually tackles the message of the police “shoot first, ask questions later” problem enough to where it makes you think yet it doesn’t try to hit you over the head multiple times with it. The message also gets right that it can be ANY cop, not just white and racist. If the story had gone down the path of Queen & Slim staying at the scene and on trial, I’ll admit it could’ve went into that territory and I might’ve had a problem with that? It seems like you can’t satisfy me, right? That’s not necessarily true, Lena Waithe could’ve surprised me going down that avenue of the story, we’ll just never know.

Remember earlier, when I described the conflict I had with a couple of over the top comedic moments against the better lighter moments between the two characters? Those lighter moments are what made the movie for me. I won’t get into all of them for spoilers sake, but when these moments happen, the movie completely shines and takes it to another level I wish the rest of the movie could’ve been. But I reiterate, I did enjoy the movie enough, and the positives outweigh my dumb issues with the film to give it a recommendation. The film looks good, the cinematography is gritty yet gorgeous, and director Melina Matsoukas, known for episodes of Insecure and Master of None, knows how to perfectly frame a film and is clearly one of those rare perfect actor’s directors. This film can connect to a lot of people. It already has if box office numbers from this weekend prove anything (it did better than expectations). All I am asking for I guess was I would’ve liked a tighter screenplay with clearer motivations that made sense, and also some less ‘Get Out’ over the top comedic moments. Otherwise, you have a solid road trip thriller. If you have any interest in going on the run and joining Queen & Slim on their adventure, I’d say take the trip if you get a chance. Might not warrant multiple trips, but I think you’ll enjoy the ride for what it is.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: THE REPORT (Amazon Prime)

None of my theaters had a great late evening show of Queen & Slim, and add to that a bit of Abuelo’s food poisoning, and I didn’t end up seeing that (but will this week), and instead caught up with a new movie that was just released on Amazon Prime called THE REPORT, starring Adam Driver. In the vein of Spotlight and the also recent Dark Waters, The Report details one man’s quest for the truth when investigating into the CIA’s post 9/11 Detention and Interrogation Program. Needless to say if you cover politics heavily or are familiar with these events, this man discovers some shocking secrets indeed. This isn’t an action film or even really a thriller, it is very dialogue heavy, but don’t worry, the screenplay is very tight, giving the audience all the main important information needed and in a way everyone over the age of 18 could probably understand. Some of these filmmakers in Hollywood really want ordinary citizens to know the truth of what went on behind the scenes of some of the most famous debacles in history, and they fear (and rightly so) the only way to do so is turn it into a feature length film, but hopefully entertaining enough so no one is nodding off at home streaming it. Hell, they’re right. I wouldn’t have searched into this if there wasn’t this movie telling me all this shit that went down. They also did their due diligence with this film: I did not get sleepy once, and I watched it pause free until the end credits.

With Adam Driver being in everything under the sun this past year, from Star Wars, to Marriage Story, to this, to other shit I’ve probably forgotten about, how in the hell did he have time to film this? Well, considering the fact that there isn’t that many locations shown during the movie and it’s basically him in a room looking over paperwork for half of it and then in his boss’ office for the other half, I’d say this took no more than two weeks to film. But no matter, I didn’t expect an actioner, I expected an informative film to keep my eye lids open and on my tippy-toes, provided that the movie also delivered with the acting. It did, as Adam Driver is again at the top of his game, throwing some semblance of a conscience into the proceedings when his character is told time and again not to make the investigation personal. There are other actors in this as well, such as Corey Stoll, Jon Hamm, Michael C. Hall, and Annette Bening, but they are all just window dressing to Driver’s building, which was fine, because the movie would’ve made a mistake if it focused on anybody other than him.

The movie is written and directed by Scott Z. Burns, who is more of a screenplay writer than he is a director. I think this is his first big feature to flex his directing muscles. He’s definitely an actors director and would make a solid one moving forward if he stuck to the informative projects he’s been involved with. He also wrote The Informant!, Contangion, Side Effects, The Bourne Ultimatum. Don’t really see him ever directing an action-er considering a lot of this film was just point and shoot but am willing to give him a chance considering he’s a very strong writer and knows what he’s doing. I am not going to dive into my own opinion of these torture reports and my view on politics as A. I don’t want any of you political afficianados ripping me a new one if I don’t see eye to eye with you and B. I need to stick with my view on movies, as that is what I love to do and what I think I’m good at talking/writing about. And as a movie, The Report was shocking, informative, entertaining, with very impressive dialogue, impressive acting and an impressive way to get this vast amount of information (we are told the initial report is 7,000 pages long) into just a 2 hr film. Gets a solid B+ from me, a good report indeed.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: KLAUS (Netflix)

Hey, so it’s after Thanksgiving so you are probably looking for Christmas classics to watch with the family while they are still here for the weekend, exhausted from the bullshit that is Black Friday. While there are old reliable films such as Home Alone, The Santa Claus, It’s A Wonderful Life, White Christmas, Jingle All The Way, the bajillion adaptations of A Christmas Carol, and the classic claymation specials. Or if your family is just full of adults and you are into more sinister shit like Die Hard, some version of Black Christmas, Bad Santa or even the newer Better Watch Out, there is a new film I’d like to talk about on Netflix that was just released. Something that everyone, young and old, will enjoy, and that I think will end up being called a holiday classic in the next five years. It’s called KLAUS, and it is a more grounded, realistic take on how the whole myth and story of Kris Kringle came to be. It’s basically Santa Claus Begins, but with beautiful hand drawn animation that uses CGI lighting techniques to create an unique all new animated tale. It’s really something, the movie just keeps getting better and better as it goes along and deserves its emotional climax that I swear to God if you don’t have a lump in your throat, tearing up, or crying your eyes out at the end of it, you need a lump of coal in your stocking this year.

The film starts out with a post master general sending his self entitled spoiled brat son to a place far off north called Smeerensburg in a “make it or break it” deal: either successfully handle 6,000 letters in a year or be cut off from his lifestyle. When he gets to the town, it appears deserted but in actuality is invested by two groups of people that can’t fucking stand each other. There’s even a bell in the middle of town and when/if rung, they all come out of their homes to try to violently beat the shit out of each other (keep in mind, this is a family film so no one is actually really hurt and/or killed). Anyway, this spoiled brat postman eventually befriends a reclusive toy-maker, who feels bad for the children in the town that don’t have the hatred in their hearts the parents have for each other, and without spoiling anything else that happens in the film, the origin of the story of Santa Claus comes to light, albeit a bit more organically and realistically. There is of course more to the story, including a great comic relief gag about a woman that is a teacher at a school in town that isn’t used as a school, but as a fish shop, that all culminates in an hour and 36 minute tale that is magically funny, charming, heartrending, heartbreaking, yet hopeful and inspiring.

The voice acting elevates the film even more than the storytelling already does, with Jason Schwartzman, Rashida Jones, Joan Cusack, Norm MacDonald, the great J.K. Simmons, all providing excellent vocals to make all their characters come alive and not be one dimensional. Every emotional beat is earned, all wrapped into a giant incredible hand drawn animation package that you just don’t see anymore nowadays, but still wish you did. What is incredible is that Disney had nothing to do with this, this is Netflix’s first original animated feature, and they completely knock it out of the park. Their storytelling is so phenomenal, not even some of the best Pixar films have come close to matching Klaus’ wit and dexterity. I’m liking that my reviews have been shorter the past couple of go a-rounds, so I think I’ll end it here, and just say, Merry Thanksgiving/Christmas to all, and for those to all have a good night, cue this delightful film up to give your family nights some much needed holiday cheer.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: THE IRISHMAN (Netflix)

If Goodfellas, The Wolf Of Wall Street, Taxi Driver, Raging Bull and The Departed are masterful Scorcese, and if Casino, The Aviator, Gangs of New York are great Scorcese, then Shutter Island, Silence, Hugo, and THE IRISHMAN are good Scorcese. Because really, has there ever been a bad Martin Scorcese film? Not that I’ve seen. This being his magnum opus and finale to his unofficial ‘gangster’ trilogy (the other two being Goodfellas and Casino. The Departed was more fictional), I expected maybe a bit…more? And no, not more run time wise (being 3 hrs and 30 minutes). One giant, glaring problem with the movie is that it is just way, way, way, way, long. There were several scenes I felt could’ve been cut to not only secure a smaller run time but maybe be a bit tighter narrative wise so that the end would’ve had a more emotional punch (maybe something between Goodfellas run time of 2 hrs and 30 minutes, and Casino’s run time of 3 hrs) Don’t get me wrong, I still liked the movie quite a bit, and the de-aging technology was absolutely phenomenal, but in the long run case of Martin Scorcese’s new movie, I felt like a little less would’ve been more.

But you get some great Scorcese scenes in here, particularly when he does his thing of making a scene nice, smooth, and rolling (literally) with a dolly, going into one room, back out, around, then back in. All the camera work in this film is stunning. And you get the great Scorcese acting. Everyone in here does a great job, to DeNiro, Pacino, and Pesci (although I can’t really see any acting nominations coming, a hard maybe with Pacino) to even Anna Paquin’s only two lines in the movie, every nuance performance makes a powerful statement. And this based on a true story tale is very interesting, and Wikipedia again makes more of a perfect log line then I could’ve: “The film follows Frank Sheeran (De Niro), a truck driver who becomes a hitman and gets involved with mobster Russell Bufalino (Pesci) and his crime family, including his time working for the powerful Teamster Jimmy Hoffa (Pacino).” I like my gangster dramas grounded, real, and down to Earth. And even though a lot of reports said that when Frank Sheeran divulged all this information near the end of his life, that he was more than likely full of it, everything that happens seemed real, like it really could’ve taken place, so I was completely sold.

The film uses its violence in just the right way, it isn’t over excessive or glorifying, and all the time periods it went through felt like those time periods. So why in the hell am I only saying it is good Scorcese, but not great or masterful? Again, it’s the run time. And I know the run time is supposed to make it feel like you were with Frank Sheeran all his life so when that last shot happens in the film, the message about these people’s lonely and dangerous lives really gets into your head, there are plenty of movies that achieved the same effect but were 45 minutes to an hour shorter. Constantly throughout the film, I was pointing to my television screen saying, “okay, didn’t really need that,” “nope, didn’t need that” and the film goes all Return of the King on us and has multiple endings, which lessens the emotional punch that the final shot is supposed to have.

The film still has an emotional punch, don’t get me wrong, it’s just lessened by the excessive amount of time it takes to make those points. And it just made me a little disappointed. Emphasis on little. Because the rest of the film is pretty great. Scorcese picks the perfect oldie music to surround his film, the editing and score is perfect, and the pacing is pretty good even though a couple of scenes go on too long. I’m not going to make the same mistake as Scorcese and have this review go on and on and on and on. So while I’m not going to make you an offer you can’t refuse to watch The Irishman, if you’ve got three hours and a half hours to kill, I can recommend that you can’t go wrong with another yard spinning new (and maybe last) gangster tale from a master class director.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: HONEY BOY

You probably haven’t heard of the movie HONEY BOY, or if you have then you probably know it’s the one that Shia LeBeouf wrote based around a younger version of him and his father. It takes place over a couple of days of them living in a ramshackle hotel sort of place while Shia, or in this case Otis, completes all of his child career Hollywood gigs. It also flash forwards to an older Otis to see how his PTSD of having to deal with his asshole father has effected his young adult life. Oh, and Shia LeBeouf plays his own father. And probably gives the best performance of his career, even though I have already said that about 3 times already with Lawless, Fury, and The Peanut Butter Falcon. Lucas Hedges of course delivers as the adult version of Shia/Otis, but the scene stealer (when LeBeouf isn’t on screen) is the kid that plays the younger version, the kid that you might’ve just seen playing Christian Bale’s son in Ford V Ferrari, Noah Jupe. Hopefully he isn’t having a stressful and sad childhood like Shia did. The whole point of this very short Thanksgiving review is: is the movie as sweet as honey, or more of a pie in the face?

Not really either. It’s half way decent but a lot of parts are really hard to watch because of the awful way Shia’s father behaved. I’d probably never watch this movie again, but I have a feeling writing this film, and then starring as his own abusive father was really therapeutic for Shia to finally let himself heal and focus on the positives of the rest of his life and career. Also, it turns out Shia is a very decent writer as well as an actor and I look forward to seeing other projects that he happens to write a screenplay for, as I see fantastic future potential. I did like the vagueness of some of the screenplay, going out of its way to avoid saying what projects that Shia is working on both young and older where he’s having these drinking, drug, and behavior problems, but little robot noises and an explosion set, a set where he’s in old prohibition clothes, and a fantasy sequence talking to a television dad actor obviously points to his time during Transformers, Lawless, and Even Stevens.

This movie is basically in existence to explain his weird past behavior and a very solid warning to those that think fame is everything, it isn’t. I feel really really really bad for what Shia had to go through and can only hope that getting all this out gives him some peace. He’s fantastic in it. Absolutely fantastic. Everybody is. The younger Otis/Shia has some really remarkable scenes with this much older young adult that lives in the same shanty hotel (I didn’t know if she was some kind of prostitute but it was hinting she was) that is borderline romantic and almost goes into statutory rape territory, but it stays platonic. They just really need each other to get through life. The film is directed Alma Ha’rel, her first feature length, and instead of going all independent shaky cam, she combines it with some truly remarkable static shots proving that she is a force to look out for in future projects. Honey Boy is a decent little movie that isn’t just therapeutic for Shia, but a word of warning for people that have too many fantastical thoughts about fame, but even at a short 93 minutes, it may be too hard for some to experience more than once.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: DARK WATERS (no spoilers)

I’m going to try and limit this review to three paragraphs as there isn’t a whole lot to say about DARK WATERS (not to be confused with Dark Water, a very shitty 2005 horror film that starred Jennifer Connolly). That’s not necessarily a bad thing though as the movie itself is horrifyingly good and any other year where the competition wouldn’t be so stacked this would have easily nabbed a Best Adapted Screenplay Oscar nomination. The movie is based on a 2016 article entitled “The Lawyer Who Became DuPont’s Worst Nightmare.” Wikipedia.com has a great log line for it, to which I will borrow because it is the only way to talk about it without getting into the fun of unraveling these real life shockers: “An attorney (played by Mark Ruffalo) links a number of unexplained deaths to one of the world’s largest corporations, DuPont. In the process, he risks everything – his future, his family, and his own life – to expose the truth.” And the truth might make you sick, quite literally. When the movie was done I had a bad taste in my mouth and my stomach was very upset. This movie is not for the faint of heart, any extreme germ-phobic people out there, or anyone who gets sick very easily. As I said though, that doesn’t make the movie bad.

In fact the movie is quite engaging, and that is in thanks to a very tight screenplay that the producers of Spotlight decided to make into a movie, and even had one of Spotlight’s stars Mark Ruffalo, to produce and star in it as well. The movie is a bit mis-marketed as a somewhat paranoia thriller even though the movie only really has a 3 minute scene of Mark Ruffalo thinking that people are out to get him from the truth being exposed. That truth? I won’t reveal it on here, but I’ll give you a hint, you might be looking at kitchen appliances a little bit different after the movie and doing some major chemical research. It’s not only shocking with what goes down but how long, as the movie takes place from 1998 and ends around 2015, revealing that this kind and good natured lawyer is still fighting the good fight today. Watching this movie will make you hate corporations and greedy human beings more, that much I can tell you. Anne Hathaway and Tim Robbins also star in the film as Ruffalo’s wife and boss respectively, and while they are good, they aren’t really given all that much to do besides a speech or two about family, honor, and fighting the big guns. Ruffalo is good as well, but nothing great or any quirky like his fantastic performance in Spotlight. The scene stealer goes to Bill Camp, who you probably don’t know but he plays a bunch of supporting roles in a bunch of movies you seen. Here he plays a farmer that brings to light all these problems on his farm, and with a heavy accent, breaks your damn heart.

So yeah, if you like legal thrillers/dramas, Dark Waters is a must see. It is extremely engaging in its two hour run time, and the screenplay manages to make the audience make sense of all of what this DuPont corporation did and the compounds and consequences of these chemicals they talk about without spoon feeding it to everyone. This movie would make a great double feature with any of your favorite legal thrillers/dramas out there, but I would say this could be looked at as a spiritual successor to the great Spotlight (one of my favorite films the year it came out, it also won Best Picture that year) itself. But be forewarned again, you will be shocked to your core of what was gotten away with for so long, and while I know this is a “based on a true story/article type thing” where the based on part should probably have a bunch of asterisks after it, I have a feeling there is a bunch of truth to what happened, and even a shred of it is enough to make you sick to your stomach. I hope every single individual that went along with the charade and causing or hiding the truth is either burning hell, jail, or out of their own fucking mind with guilt. Please don’t read anything about it before you go into it, the impact of it will be that much harder for you. By the end credits you’ll feel like you’ve been doused with a bunch of this dirty water, and will be itching to get home to clean yourself off.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: KNIVES OUT (ABSOLUTELY NO SPOILERS)

What can I say about KNIVES OUT, easily 2019’s best film of the year for me so far, without giving away anything? Because with this very special movie written and directed by Rian Johnson, just like I said about Parasite a month ago, it is best to go into the theater completely dark. So, like my review of Parasite, my review of Knives Out is going to be very short, and bullet pointed. I’m going to have one short vague sentence about it, list my vague likes and dislikes of it, and just overall be vague, vague, vague. There are no clues or any mystery to my review, I’m saving every entertaining moment for your experience in the theater, letting you decipher the greatness of this film on its own. Here we go:

What is Knives Out about?

The head of a rich family patriarch dies under mysterious circumstances and a detective named Benoit Blanc (played by Daniel Craig) is on the case.

Why did I like Knives Out so much to make it my #1 film of 2019 so far?

You won’t see another movie as entertaining as this one all year. 2 hrs and 10 minutes goes by without one hiccup and you must pay attention to every second of the movie to experience the perfection of Rian Johnson’s screenplay.
There are little set ups and little pay offs, and big set ups and big pay offs, all of them land perfectly on their feet.
I did not guess or predict any of the twists or turns that this movie had. Completely shocked by every reveal and revelation.
Replay value, I could watch this film over and over and over and over and over again.
Best fun mystery whodunit film since Clue, except this one is more grounded and a little more serious, but even more fun and funny than the classic 80s film.
The performances are all incredible, but Daniel Craig, Chris Evans, and Ana De Armas completely steal the show. Daniel Craig’s Alabama accent in here is deliciously borderline over the top and hilarious, Chris Evans gives us his best performance ever, and Ana De Armas’s character is the most I have rooted for a protagonist since Rey in The Force Awakens. In fact, any Last Jedi haters out there can now go fuck themselves because of this movie.
The dialogue is crisp, clever, and comedic. Very delightful. The movie could’ve gone on another hour and I wouldn’t have noticed.
Camera angles, placement, and movement when it needed to were on point with the scenes that they accompanied.
Go see it.
What are you doing still reading this? Go fucking see it now.

What did I not like about the movie?

One very minor bullshit nitpick. This movie has a shit ton of A-listers, and while they all get one or two moments to shine, I wish some of them were in the film more as they were just so delightful to watch. But them being in the film any more might’ve made the story too bloated, and the movie is as perfect as a movie could be. So strike this complaint for the record.

I loved KNIVES OUT. If I didn’t have a child I’d probably see it two or three more times in the theater. I can’t wait to own it. It’s incredible. Get a clue from this review, go out and seek it before I start to boo you.

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: FROZEN II

Have any of you watched any ‘making of’ docs or featurettes on Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom? If you have, after seeing FROZEN II, you might be already getting the point I’m about to make, but if you haven’t, let me clue you in a little on the big reveal from those little insights into the darkest chapter of the Indiana Jones franchise. It is revealed from Spielberg, Kathleen Kennedy, and even Lucas himself that most of Temple of Doom is just jumbled up unused ideas, themes, and scenes left on the cutting room floor from Raiders of the Lost Ark. The beginning at Club Obi-Wan through the jumping out of an airplane on an inflatable raft scene to the fast and furious mine cart chase near the climax of the film, all little unused ideas. Probably the reason why I don’t re-watch that film quite as much as the others (don’t worry, I still think Crystal Skull is still the worst of the four). What I’m trying to get at is that FROZEN II felt the exact same way for me, a bunch of unused messages, themes, and ideas that they probably had for the first movie but had to not include due to it not working with the flow of the first film. This film only feels like a half realized idea. In my opinion, the film is also way too dark and depressing for children, the songs aren’t memorable at all, the adults won’t get into the story and may even be bored by it, and they should’ve just left everything about the first movie alone. This didn’t need a sequel.

The film isn’t terrible, I just found it boring and unnecessary. After watching it and being ultimately disappointed by what I saw, and then went and did some research about when the first one came out (6 years ago) and how long they took to make it (a year and a half to come up with the story, much longer to create each and every animated frame), I came up with a personal (yet arguable conclusion): Disney forced the filmmakers to make this sequel when they didn’t have any solid story ideas or any justifiable reason for doing another adventure other than Disney just wanted more box office bucks and licensing to sell more toys. I bet you anything that the filmmakers had other original ideas up their sleeves, but when brought to Disney, they didn’t even take a look, they just shook their heads, tapped their watches, and asked when they would develop a sequel to one of their most successful animated films of all time. The creators probably didn’t want to do it, but Disney kept adding those 0s to their contracts, and after the last and final no, Disney exclaimed, “okay, if you won’t make it, someone else will.” It is then that the filmmakers didn’t want anybody else in control of their “baby,” and finally said yes, even though their hearts weren’t truly into it like they were with the first one. Not only truly into it, but they felt rushed to get a completed project out into the world by a certain date. Now keep in mind that this is just my heavy duty conjecture just to give the creators an excuse of why I was personally let down by this sequel. Because if none of that is true, and their hearts were completely into it and they had more than enough time with their songs and ideas and didn’t feel rushed at all…then that just makes this film worse in my mind.

I know a lot of people find the first film overrated, but that is because they didn’t watch until long after the crazed hype it received right after it was released. I personally still love the first movie, not just because I saw it the first night it came out before the casual moviegoer obsession began but also because I’ve watched it a thousand times with my young one, who gives his undivided attention to each and every viewing, and points and shouts with glee every time he sees one of the characters outside of home. To give a point of reference to my screening that I had over the weekend, I took my young one with my wife to a Camp Cinemark showing of the sequel, which kids are allowed to talk a little and move around a little (or a lot with both in some cases); a screening that die hard fans and non interrupted folk should stay far away from. With my son, I’ve learned to tolerate the distractions, and wasn’t really upset with my screening, and was confident coming out of it that I didn’t miss any of the movie. My son was the perfect little moviegoer during his screening, making me wish we had just went to a regular one as he leaned his head on my arm and paid attention to most of the entire thing. But I’m glad I ended up going to that show in the long run, because with my new found powers of heightened peripheral vision, hearing and side attention techniques I developed having having my first child, I was able to read the room with what they thought of the sequel as well, and it wasn’t good.

Kids barely paid attention to it, several of them saying out loud that they were bored or wanted to watch the original again, others screamed or cried during the really dark or sad parts of the movie, I heard adults whispering to themselves that they weren’t enjoying the sequel at all and that the songs weren’t very good, looking at their phone clocks to see how much time they had left in that miserable experience. When the film was over, there was not a clap of enjoyment, not even from my 2 year old son who claps when the credits roll on ANYTHING, and only a handful of people stayed for the songs during the credits or to even witness a half way decent after credits scene. To summarize: children and adults, at least in my screening, weren’t having it. And please believe me, I TRIED to give this sequel a chance, but after the first song I was like…”uh oh.” During the first movie, I had each and every song already stuck in my head before the next one played across the screen, already knowing and humming the words as I left the theater into the many days and weeks and years after to present day. I know the whole damn first movie by heart because of my son’s love for the film (not a bad thing.) I knew that there was no way a sequel could top or maybe even getting close to the magic of the first film, but I was hoping upon hope that I could be proven wrong. Alas, 3/4ths into the film, into the incredibly dark and depressing third act, I had given my hopes up.

Telling you any of the story would probably be considered spoilers, but I’m going to try so I can get my point of disappointment across. The first thing you should know is that the grand adventure advertised in the trailers and tv spots is nowhere to be found. Elsa, Anna, Olaf, Kristoff, and Sven find this small, magical, closed off place in the forest and spend some time in there dealing with past shit, all the while Kristoff is trying to find a time and place to propose marriage to Anna. Not much happens, but that’s all I can really say without spoiling the film. The “not much happens “parts, to be very vague, are just messages and themes already explored in the first film that just felt repetitive all combined in the giant melting pot of a ‘reparations’ story line we’ve seen time and again from other and much, much better films. There are new characters in the film, but none of them get much screen time, leading to each and every single one of them feeling one note, the characterization all surface level, nothing deep. They only learn and change their attitudes instantly with several lines of dialogue the main characters give them at the drop of a hat. The center and arguably single stage only allows Elsa, Anna, Kristoff, Sven, and Olaf to have character development, but instead of learning more about their inner selves like the script should’ve done, they only learn more about their untold surrounding history. All of this leads to revelations and fates they already experienced or should have experienced in the first film. The very, very ending fate of one of the main characters that happens in this sequel I had predicted would happen at the end of the first film while watching it for the first time, but was wrong. It happening in this film is part of the feeling I had about recycled or unused ideas I mentioned in my first paragraph.

None of the songs are memorable except for Kristoff’s funny love ballad, but that is mostly due to the visuals and the reindeer. But even with that song I wasn’t humming it nor was it stuck in my had afterward. None of them were, I can’t only remember the title of the song ‘Into The Unknown,’ because those three words were repeating over and over and over and over and over again for most of the song. To go even one step further with my complaints, some of the songs seems to borrow too much not only visually, but narratively from the first film. One song, ‘Show Yourself,’ copies almost verbatim visually from when Elsa belted out ‘Let It Go’ from the first one, all the way down to when she makes herself a new outfit using her powers. Then something happens to her that was narratively verbatim to what happened to a different character in the first film. It all just felt like unused or recycled shit, but in new gift wrapping, with a new pretty bow. Make no mistake, this film is visually, very, very well done. Everything looks gorgeous, some parts even breathtakingly beautiful. But special effects do not make a film. You should know that already because of Michael Bay and Transformers. Or James Cameron’s Avatar.

And the voice acting of course is still great. Everybody involved, Idina Menzel, Kristen Bell, Josh Gad, Jonathan Groff, and even with little to do, Sterling K. Brown, Even Rachel Wood, and Alfred Molina, all do a fantastic job. The singing, sound mixing, sound editing, score, all perfect, it’s just packaged in a story I could never quite get invested in. And since I didn’t care about the story, or the songs, I didn’t care about the characters, which made me just not really care for the entire product. And if their heart wasn’t it in, they didn’t try hard enough, but if their heart was, then they tried way too hard. Sometimes with sequels, even though you want to do something drastically different, if its a kids movie, you can still do it, but you have to keep it simple. The story, themes, and sad parts in this film I feel are wayyyy too dark and depressing for the target audience that Disney was intending. They shouldn’t be making a movie for the ones that enjoyed the original film six years ago, they needed to make it for the ages of what all of us were (young and older) back then. A sequel to bring in a new audience but still fun, light, and bright like the original. It tried to mature way too much. Disney has always been able to ride that fine line (tightrope) between a kid movie and an adult movie, so precise in fact that it gives a film for everyone to enjoy. This film tripped over itself too much into the adult category, much like Ralph Breaks The Internet did (although I enjoyed that sequel so much more than this one, the story and character development were very strong and kept my undivided attention.)

All of this ends with someone asking me, “did you like Frozen 2?” and I answer with a crunched up meh face, a shake of my head and a shrug of my shoulders. It’s not something I’m going to get upset over if people really like it and think I’m wrong (I’m already tapped out of that after Joker). And if your kids like it, wonderful, I hope it brings them hours of repeat joy in the future. I have one more nitpick about the movie, but it goes vastly into spoiler territory, and it also just happens to be some bullshit I’m probably pulling out of my ass because it’s politically related, and I’m just tired of seeing that influence in films that don’t need to have those kinds of messages in them. Scroll way down for me just running my mouth. I just personally didn’t really like the movie, I think its a very mediocre sequel, and I think once the people that really like it give it enough time, the flaws will start to seep through the cracks. Especially when what happens when the second one hits home video and you’ve watched the first one a thousand times, put the sequel in, only get about halfway through it only to eject and put the first one on a thousand more times. There is way too much hardship in this movie. Ultimately, Frozen II tries too hard to be what The Empire Strikes Back did for Star Wars and instead it should’ve been something more akin to the Ewok sequences in Return of the Jedi.

**one spoiler paragraph warning** Okay, so this nitpick I’m pulling out of my ass as I probably read too much into films these days as seeing all these articles about movies containing references to today’s political climate or supporting social justice warrior’s agendas and all that crap. So take what I theorize with a grain of salt. It reveals in the film that this small place in the forest cut off from everyone so long ago has two group of people trapped within its magical borders: old Arendelle soldiers and magic Nomad people. t\They all hate each other because of Anna and Elsa’s grandfather, who basically was a fucking asshole bigot (Trump anyone?). For the two groups of people to get out of this purgatory-like place and break the magic spell trapping all of them there not able to leave, not only do they have to like and respect each other, but there is a dam that, if destroyed, will break the spell and let everyone escape. But also to destroy this dam would also completely flood and destroy Arendelle in the process. As Anna finds out that her parents were basically the Romeo and Juliet of these two groups, Anna also realizes the dam must be destroyed as a reparation of sorts for the sins of their grandfather and what he did to these spiritual magical nomads long ago (killed them). She gets these magic rock giant beings to throw giant boulders at it to break open the dam, but Elsa comes in on a horse (quite literally) and saves Arendelle from being destroyed anyway. The whole time I was just thinking, “Oh God, is this an anti-Trump, anti-Trump border wall movie? Are you fucking kidding me?” I don’t like Trump as much as the next person, don’t get me wrong, I’m just tired of seeing these type of messages taken from our political climate put inside a kids movie. They need to not do that. Now if that wasn’t the intention of the filmmakers, I apologize for trying to tie threads together that don’t exist and instead of trying to read too hard for these kinds of messages in these movies, I need to just….let it go. But if our politics today influenced this story at all in any way, and I’m right about some of my theories, shame on you filmmakers, come up with something more original and less preachy next time please. Thanks. **end of spoiler paragraph and the real end of the review**

Zach’s Zany Movie Reviews: A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD

If Tom Hanks doesn’t at least get nominated for supporting actor for his portrayal of Fred Rogers in A BEAUTIFUL DAY IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD this year, I would definitely say the Academy doesn’t really care about him anymore. I get why he didn’t get nominated for his last two pretty good performance, Captain Phillips and Saving Mr. Banks, but not giving him recognition for this one would be inexcusable. He doesn’t just portray Fred Rogers in this, he embodies him. Sometimes I completely forgot it was Hanks in the role, it was incredible. But the real question? Is the movie any good, because I’ve said it a billion times, a great performance does not make a movie. Well the good new neighbor, is that yes, the movie is thankfully pretty solid too. It’s about learning to forgive and how to deal with your feelings that culminates in something heartful yet heartbreaking. So much so that a lot of you will like it, but only be able to watch it once.

Now if you are interested in seeing it, know going into it that this isn’t a biography on Fred Rogers. If you want something like that I would recommend last years fantastic documentary Won’t You Be My Neighbor?, which was completely snubbed at the Oscars and for no good reason. This film is a “inspired by true events” type of affair which should have a lot more quotation marks and asterisks around the word “inspired.” This all connects together for you know as you were probably wondering why I said Tom Hanks should get a supporting nomination instead of lead even though he is the first name on all the marketing and promotional materials. This film is about a man named Lloyd Vogel (very far off from the real person’s name that inspired this story) that is writing a piece on Fred Rogers for Esquire. We get to know this man much much much more than Fred Rogers. We learn that he’s trying to be there for his wife and his newborn son. More than his father ever was, and we learn that he can’t forgive his father for some pretty big and arguably unforgiving reasons that to tell you any of them would ruin most of the movie. The man basically learns through his interviews for his piece of Fred Rogers the power of feelings, how to control them, and how to forgive.

The film starts off ingeniously though, where it seems like they are going to do a whole entire reenactment of one of the episodes of Mr. Rogers Neighborhood, and a little of the ways into it, sets up the story of Vogel. Everything about recreating Mr. Rogers Neighborhood is absolutely uncanny. It changes aspect ratio when it goes back to the show, with that grainy television feel, and Tom Hanks doesn’t just do an impersonation of Fred Rogers, he embodies him to the point where I couldn’t even tell it was Tom Hanks during much of the run time. Matthew Rhys plays Vogel, the tormented man with an inability to forgive, and I’ve never seen Rhys on his most famous and praise worthy role, that on The Americans, I just know that here he was fantastic as well, and his performance makes me actually want to check out the finished show on Netflix, whenever I can find the time. Chris Cooper plays the father, a tormented soul himself, trying not only to make amends with his son, but trying to forgive himself for his sins of the past. Cooper is usually reliable in any role he takes, even The Muppets, so it is no surprise here that he brings his A game to Neighborhood as well. Enrico Colantoni has a small but quirky role as a manager of Fred Rogers, and his small moments give the film the comic relief that it needs.

For those of you disappointed that the film isn’t really about Fred Rogers, fear not, as Hanks and some of the aspects of the show are in the film quite a bit. It shows the making of some of the segments, Hanks embodying even the puppets that Fred Rogers used to control and voice for the program. The movie also delves a little bit into Rogers private life, such as his relationship with his wife and his sons, tidbits that you would maybe want to follow up on, which in that case, again, I’d recommend watching the documentary, as it gives you more of the whole picture. Watching this film and that film makes for the perfect double feature. This is a more fictionalized account of Fred Rogers helping out a journalist that “saved his life.” The article this movie is based on is real, the inspiration the journalist got out of Rogers is real, and Rogers is real, but I have a feeling that a lot of the conversations and situations they showed on screen were highly fictionalized, hence the “inspired” part of the true story that you see flash on screen during the opening credits. But that’s okay, as the whole movie packs an emotional wallop with these aspects, and could even inspire the coldest of hearts out there who actually find the time to give this film a chance. The movie certainly isn’t a re-watchable kind of thing, as some will find it maybe a little too depressing and emotional to keep recollecting over and over again, but it is a very solid one time viewing. It has a solid message we should all learn and seeing Hanks extraordinary performance is a requirement.